Monday, January 4, 2010

What I want and what really is...

It's been a while since I blogged and this one is a breather...

What I want to have happen and what seems to be happening are at odds with each other.  In more than one way, I want to be moving forward, making strides toward the places I want to be, I don't even want to be at my destination yet, I just want to be heading that way...

The places I want to be going seem to either never get closer or move even further away, and while I haven't started moving backwards it feels like I haven't started moving forwards either.  To be quite honest it drives me a little bit crazy.  The question of weather or not the place I have been looking at going is even the place I'm supposed to go has been beating my faith to a pulp lately... It get's hard to hold on to Faith when half your brain starts working so hard against it.

I suppose it's a part of any journey, there are always the stretches that seem like they take far more time then they should.  Moments that feel like they will never end, like there really isn't a destination at all, like the only thing is that stretch of road that goes on forever and the scene never changes.

I certainly hope the scene changes soon, I trust it will, but that doesn't make it happen any less annoyingly slow...

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